One of the long-lasting effects of trauma is the formation of negative beliefs. This is not always obvious due to the way the brain approaches a belief. Although I am describing the belief that can take root in reaction to a traumatic incident as a negative belief, the brain takes it in as neither negative nor positive; it is just a belief. The person with the negative belief might not be overly aware of how this belief is insidious and pervasive and negative; it simply feels true.
Understanding how traumatic experiences contribute to the development of negative beliefs can be helpful in the healing process. Let's look at this more closely.
There are many different kinds of events that can lead to a traumatic response.
Sometimes it is a single incident, such as a serious car accident. Other times, the event happens multiple times, spanning many years. Such is often the case with childhood abuse or neglect. In addition, what one may experience as traumatic, may not be the case for another; context is important.
For the purposes of this post, let's explore how context impacts a trauma response and how this then connects to the development of a negative belief.
The Scenario + Context
If a young child is touched inappropriately by an adult and this child tells their parent and their parent responds appropriately (e.g., believes the child, supports the child to process the event, and puts additional safety measures in place to prevent the event from happening again), it’s very possible this child will not experience a long-lasting effect. It will be a thing that happened in which the child received confirmation that they matter and are cared for and will get through whatever life brings their way because this is what the parent modeled for them by their side.
Sadly, it is a too frequent occurrence that this scenario plays out much differently: when the child tells the parent, the parent does not believe them, shames them, or punishes them. And even if the incident never occurs again, the reaction from the parent leaves a lasting mark, such that seeds of shame, self-doubt, and unworthiness are sown.
The context surrounding the event provides the opportunity for a negative belief to be introduced (or reaffirmed) as true.
This experience - the incident in the context of a negative parental reaction - likely sets the stage for how the child perceives future events, as their lens through which they understand themselves, others, and the world is fundamentally altered...and not for the good.
But definitely in a way that feels true to the child, who will one day be an adult. Who on the outside may look like your ordinary human but on the inside struggles to believe they have worth and they matter.
Negative Beliefs That Could Emerge or Strengthen
Here are some possible negative beliefs that could form as a result of the incident and the parent disbelieving their child or responding in a punitive manner:
I don’t matter.
It's all my fault.
I'm not deserving of love.
I can't trust myself.
I'm alone and helpless.
Our brain tends to try to prove whatever it believes.
As this child goes about their life and experiences inevitable pain (because no one is exempt from painful experiences), they perceive these events through their now modified lens. They begin to accumulate more and more evidence to support their negative belief.
Eventually, the scales in favor of the negative belief reach a tipping point, and the negative belief settles into their psyche as truth.
Once the negative belief takes root, the brain doesn't invest as many resources to search for evidence to the contrary. And most experiences are now filtered through that negative core belief.
When people come to therapy for trauma or stuck negative beliefs, they often express, "I know logically that I'm not responsible for everything that has gone wrong, but in my gut it feels true that it is all my fault. No matter how hard I try, it just feels true."
And it's this dissonance that is often most distressing.
Trauma therapy, when done well, can help reconcile the dissonance.
With lots of work and commitment to the process, trauma therapy can help dislodge stuck core beliefs. The core belief does not disappear entirely - less you think that is possible - rather it gets a little more right-sized, which means when something happens, you can much more quickly catch how the negative belief was activated and then pivot toward a more adaptive belief that feels even more true.
It might sound a little bit like this: "Oh, that part of me who believes they are never good enough, that part just got pinged. Okay. That makes sense. It's not as distressing as it has felt in the past, but I can feel it. And I also know I'm okay as I am. That really does feel true now."
Posttraumatic Growth
There is a term that matters in the context of trauma and healing: posttraumatic growth. I am in no way advocating for one to be grateful for their traumatic experience or for one to believe they could not have become the better version of themselves today without the traumatic experience. I believe neither of those are true statements let alone healthy ideologies.
I do believe, however, that you can look at what you've been through, examine who you are today, and recognize and appreciate the positive changes you have made as a result of the struggle that ensued post-trauma.
It is not the traumatic event - no, it does not get credit - but rather YOU who chose to transform the pain and suffering into deeper healing, deeper alignment with your values, and deeper connection with your core self. And that is beautiful.
Seeking Professional Help: If you have a trauma history or negative beliefs with strong sticking power and want to learn how to heal and get unstuck, working with a trauma therapist who understands can be life-changing. To find out more about trauma therapy, please call or text 317-747-0574 or visit our contact page.
Disclaimer: The information provided on this blog is for educational purposes only and is not intended to replace professional psychological care, professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
About the Author
A counseling psychologist and creative at heart, Dr. Jessicah is the founder of Cadence Psychology Studio, a mental health group practice in Indiana that specializes in working with couples, treating trauma, and providing support to women, with a special focus on caring for moms.
Dr. Jessicah loves the creative process of (1) building a modern and relevant therapy practice and (2) mending hearts & shifting relationship dynamics in the context of therapy. Whether with individuals or with couples, she is in awe of her clients' courage and dedication to embrace wholeness and honored to be entrusted with their stories and healing journeys.
At the depth of her essence is love and gratitude for the people in her life, especially her big family, delightful husband, and two adorable children.
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